I am.
The Singer. Always in harmony with others, tenor running counter to the melody. I value the beauty of sound. I fear the sour note, the humiliation of tripping on the risers. Love singing solo. I like to stand out, be special. Dream of being a star (just like everybody else). Desperate to be noticed.
The Petty Thief. When I was a little kid, my friend had a box of chalk. We were playing outside and I really wanted that chalk. I think I knew it was wrong--but--I did it anyway. Then I went to Sunday School, and they talked about how liars and thieves go to Hell. I've never been so scared in my life!
The Teacher. Kind of obvious, but it's true. This is the dominant me, most of the time. This me recognizes the power of intelligence, knowledge, wisdom. I think students are the future (cliché, I know) and that I have a responsibility to prepare them for that. Also, to have fun. I fear the direction we are going. State vs. public education and everyone loses.
The Yo-Yo Dieter. So I've decided I want to fit into my clothes again. I'm hitting the gym on a regular basis, and I'm eating a little healthier too. But I don't know how long it will last. You see, this part of me has an archrival--the Emotional Eater. That villain invades my body and forces me to eat everything in sight--orange Hostess cupcakes are one of his particular favorites. I'm keeping him at bay for now--lost 7 pounds so far--but who knows how long I can hold my own against myself? Guess I have to stay happy. And isn't that what I'm seeking anyway--happiness?
The Cook. Some people can walk in a pantry, see a random combination of ingredients, and develop a vision of a meal that is delicious and exciting. Not me. I cook by the book, to the letter. I take a recipe and follow it exactly, as one follows a GPS to a casual dining restaurant. I'm not afraid of experimenting a little, but generally I stick to the plan. In other aspects of my life, I'm not always organized, but as the cook, I plan meals days in advance. I get stressed out when the menu needs to be changed and when I run out of eggs, but most of the time I feel like I'm the king of the kitchen.
The Native Minnesotan. First of all, I'm not a Yankee, thank you very much. According to Wikipedia, the term Yankee refers to "people originating in the northeastern US, or still more narrowly New England." (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yankee) No, I'm not a Yankee. I'm a proud Midwesterner. I think Minnesota is a great state, despite the snow piling up in graceful arcs like giraffes' necks. The majority of my values come from my early years in a small town on the iron range, where people view loyalty, integrity, and diligence as the most important qualities a person can exhibit. I fear the ignorance of others who think all Minnesotans speak with the accent from Fargo (which I have never seen--and isn't Fargo in North Dakota?). I love going back to visit, but I don't think I'll ever live there again. Still, I dream of sitting beside the Mississippi River and writing, reading, or meditating.
The Camp Counselor. My alter ego, Dexter, takes over when I am in summer camp mode. I'm famous, of course, for the Moose Song. I'm hesitant to post the link, but Dexter loves any chance to be in the spotlight, so here it is: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DgFBy6U1LBk&safety_mode=true&persist_safety_mode=1&safe=active. As a camp counselor, I love kids, but even more, I love acting silly. Singing songs, playing games, dominating in counselor challenges! I will always remember my little Inca Warriors from Camp Mitton. Camp allowed me to become a leader and to become comfortable with myself. I also discovered a passion for nature and for outdoor activities. As a counselor, I constantly worry whether my campers are safe and about what will be served in the dining hall for every meal. Even though I don't work at summer camp any more, I still dream of being recognized for my dedication and passion--I want to be Counselor of the Week, every time!
The Rock Climber. Reaching for that higher grip, I push hard for every goal. I always want to make it to the top. I fear falling, not so much because I'm afraid of heights, but more because I'm afraid of smashing against the wall. I despise the struggle of getting back to the wall and climbing back to where I fell. As a climber, I love striving for the top, attempting new routes, and acting as ground support for other climbers. I dream about finishing a 10-C wall, but since I'm out of practice, it probably won't ever happen. I just want to get back to Inner Peaks and feel the chalk on my hands. If I could climb every day, I would. There is no greater sense of accomplishment than ascending to the top of every new route.
The Introvert. Most days, I'd rather have a quiet evening at home than go out and party. I like to read, play video games, watch TV, or just relax. This part of me wants to avoid the world at all costs. Don't text me, don't e-mail me, and especially, don't call me. I'll ignore you. This is the deep down me from a long time ago, the product of being the social outcast for years and years. Don't get me wrong; I like spending time with my friends. But when I need a break from the world, I'll be in my room.
The Know-It-All. Most people don't like this side of me. Someone once told me I tried to hard to be perfect, and that I should just let it go. I can't. I always want to know everything. I always want to be in control. The know-it-all fears being wrong, but is good at covering his tracks with a "Well actually, what I meant was" or an "Oh yeah, I definitely knew that!" The know-it-all dreams of, well, knowing it all and, more importantly, of being perceived as always being right.
Each of these imperfect shards of a person add up to one me, flawed and imperfect. I got a tattoo once that says "human" in Arabic to remind me that it's OK not to be perfect; it's OK to be me.
I am.
